Nerves

May 1, 2010

I’ve been progressing slowly since my surgery. I can now get around a bit easier but still mainly stick to the bed and recliner. My knee feels so strange and my foot is having stabbing pains like it did before when I had drop foot, I hope that goes away soon. I’ve been looking for someone with a hinged knee replacement but am having a hard time finding someone…I can actually feel that it is two pieces and this kind of freaks me out. I’m still afraid of never walking normally again…with drop foot and a knee/tibia replacement it just seems very unlikely.

I have a nurse that comes daily to give me my shots and to change my skin graft dressing. Physical therapy won’t begin until after 6 weeks because I’m not even allowed to bend my knee right now, it has to stay in the stabilizer.

I’m getting a bit nervous about my appointment with my orthopedic oncologist on May 6th. I find out that day if my tumor had a good necrosis percentage. If over 90% was dead then I continue on with my same chemo regiment until September. If not…they try and add two more drugs and it lasts who knows how long. I’m also nervous about having metastases pop up now that the main tumor is gone. Nerves, nerves, nerves!

Other than all of the recovery, I am enjoying my mini break from chemo even though I’m stuck at home in a stabilizer. I dread going back but know it’s necessary. Right now we’re planning Callie’s birthday party for May 29th since I’ll likely be in the hospital on her real birthday or recovering from my “bad” chemo. She wants a Mickey Mouse Clubhouse theme, she seems really excited about it. I can’t believe she’s turning 3 already!

Hopefully my insurance company okays a wheelchair with an outstretched leg for me so I can get out of the house sometime in the next few weeks! I hate that Callie is stuck in the house a lot because I am…it makes me feel guilty.

I’ve included some pictures of my leg, it’s not for those with a weak stomach, so please don’t scroll down any further if you are easily grossed out!

Now that I’ve grossed you out, I hope everyone has a great weekend!